Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6
“We have company.”
Nate’s low-pitched words against her ear pierced through layers of sleep and brought her to instant alert. No threat of imminent attack presented itself to her, but she trusted the guy who could hear a heart beating a quarter mile away.
He eased off the bed and picked up the gun. “Take the keys to the van. The first chance you get, run.”
She retrieved the shirt from the floor and jabbed her arms into the sleeves. A blind vampire armed with a gun he couldn’t aim didn’t stand much of a chance against a mob of genocidal zealots. “I’m not leaving you again.”
A key grated in the lock. The knob turned.
“Fine, then. Take off the shirt and draw their attention.”
Her fingers stalled over the buttons. “Are you serious?”
“If I could see, I know where I’d look.”
See the rest of “Beyond the Darkening: Chapter 7″
… to bring you the very best oversized body parts to mount in your shower, I present the following:
A giant, green slime-dispensing nose.
Would you believe, it is sold out and backordered until February?
Which probably means a lot of people got these for Christmas.
Which raises the critical question here: WHERE IS MINE?
There is always someone who, despite much emphasis on a “no gift exchange” policy, feels it necessary to bestow unwanted gifts in the $10-$20 range on everybody, and it’s usually worthless junk like bath salts (who takes BATHS anymore, and are you trying to say I stink?) or candles (thanks, I was looking for ways to help my child and dog burn down the house this holiday season), and I gotta admit, it is a challenge to be politely appreciative.
But useless junk like a giant, green slime-dispensing nose? That, at least, is amusing. Regifting it could become a tradition almost as epic as the Singing Fish Debacle of the Nineties.
Next year, I expect better. Or grosser or stupider or ridiculouser. Use some imagination, for Santa’s sake!
Narrator: “You’ve used up all your lives on this level, you incompetent noob. Replay, or return to your pod to lick your wounds?”
Me: “Let’s do it again!”
Half the time, the cause of my dying is being distracted from what I’m doing because the game is just so much fun to watch.
Sackboy from Little Big Planet. Cutest freakin' thing in the history of the universe, perhaps more so in this, his original state, than after he's customized.
Media Molecule will make a bajillion dollars on merchandising alone. The demand for Sackboy plushies is outrageous. They could open Build-A-Sackboy Workshops in malls around the world.
We have a contest on every level to see who can make their Sackboy look more, ah… mentally challenged. Angelic Daughter so far is winning, mostly because she called dibs on the antlers and stuck the donkey tail sticker on her butt. I just can’t compete with that kind of crazy.
I was experimenting (trying to consolidate .com and blog without screwing up any links) and broke Wordpress. I think it can be done, so bear with me. Have to manually copy links and work out some of the fripperies, so this could take a while.
Original blog still works. No, it doesn’t!
