Oct 15 2007
RP: Bespectacled heroines
Lifted from March 20 Blogger entry
Ah, the ever-popular heroine who is dumpy and frumpy until she takes off her glasses and suddenly becomes the uber-hot object of every male character’s lustful fantasies.
No makeover. No change of clothes. Not even a shower. The metamorphosis from bore to babe required nothing more taxing than removing her specs.
Those must be some DAMN ugly glasses to overshadow not only her “cover girl” facial features but also her “generous cleavage,” her ass that is so extensively lauded I can’t select a single quote, and her “long, shapely legs.”
Get thyself to Lens Crafters, girl!
Not only that, but this heroine never seems to really need the glasses, since she can discard them to become a sexpot with no repercussions, such as squinting unattractively and tripping over furniture and ramming her car into oncoming traffic, so she appears to have been given glasses solely for the purpose of taking them off and revealing the startling beauty concealed behind the, um, clear plastic lenses.
Having been stuck with one form of corrective lenses or another since the age of six, that just pisses me off.
How about a myopic heroine who’s sexy with her glasses? Do any exist, or will I have to write one myself?
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October 15th, 2007 at 11:14 am
I wish I could see a heroine who kept her glasses. You know, show how sexy glasses are. Heh!
October 15th, 2007 at 11:42 am
Sing it, my bespectacled sister! What in the name of myopia is wrong with wearing glasses? They do not automatically infect with the fugliness virus, no sir. (Unless there is something no one has told me. *gulp*)
I guess it’s on the same level with big tits, tiny waist, long legs, flowing hair, etc. (Of course, all the living women I’ve seen who fit this description are creepy and plastic, but hey. I’m not a man, I guess I don’t know what men really want!) If you do not look like Malibu Barbie complete with the car and dream house, you are not a fantasy worth having.
I feel a mighty hurl coming on.
October 16th, 2007 at 4:55 am
A guy once told me he LOVED a girl in glasses because he knew when they came off, it was Time. For. Bed.
I was flipping through my umpteen WIPs and noticed I do have a myopic heroine—a genuinely blind-as-a-bat one, not “I’m only wearing these to disguise my ravishing beauty and/or show you how smart I am.” (And I hate that glasses-as-shorthand-for-brains trick, too. Like idiots never have poor vision. Gah.) She walks into a strip club, looking for her missing friend. She’s wearing a rather unfortunate suit and severe hairstyle at the time, so the whole package doesn’t exactly scream “hot mama.” Hero’s friend #1, obviously an insensitive prick, says he hopes she’s not applying for a job. Hero, who owns the place, is a perceptive guy and says she has good bones. Hero’s friend #2, who never has much to say, responds, “I’d jump them.” Aw, not one but TWO smokin’ hot men saw right through the fugly disguise.
Too bad the premise for that story is so weak, I have no idea how to write it.
October 18th, 2007 at 3:41 pm
Oh, man, no kidding! [facepalm]
I actually read a historical once (I think it was a Regency) where the heroine was “bookish” and read a lot. Her mother insisted that any young woman who reads that much “must” need spectacles and insisted that she wear them. So we have this chick who’s walking around squinting and bumping into things with her glasses on, just because the writer made the mother a flaming idiot (and yeah, the writer’s hand was extremely visible there) and however far into the book when she took them off and tossed them, it was a relief for everyone involved, aside from making her even more babe-like as usual. [facepalm]
And yes, I’ve known plenty of idiots who wore glasses. The glasses=brains thing is ridiculous as well as overused. :/
Angie