Feb 05 2008
I Have Great Quantities of Resolve…
… I use it in my carpet shampooer and to spot-treat Demon Dog stains.
The mental variety? Not so much.
I rarely purchase hardcover books. I have never purchased a hardcover romance novel, and a recent snit over a paperback caused me to proclaim I never would.
But horrible, evil beyotches are bombarding me with excerpts. Not the standard, first-chapter, get-to-the-story-already excerpts that rarely impress me all that much, but the kind of excerpts that make me want to lick somebody.
Me: “Uh nuh vunuh un huh. Nuh huhuhuh.” (Unintelligible, as I was trying to prevent my tongue from hanging out. Translation: ”I’m not budging on this. No hardcover.”)
Horrible, Evil Beyotch Uno: “You know you can’t a wait a year for this in paperback.”
Horrible, Evil Beyotch Dos: “You’ve been waiting, what, five years for him as it is? You want him bad.”
Horrible, Evil Beyotch Uno: “I think you need to read some more about his tongue.”
Me: *sobbing and making gimme fingers like a needy toddler*
In a video game, if you get poisoned and you don’t take an antidote right away, it takes a bite out of your health bar every couple of seconds until it’s all gone and you die. Well, this is Temptation chewing on my Resolve bar, and I am fresh out of antidotes and a realm away from the nearest item shop. *chomp chomp* I feel faint. All hope is lost.
I succumb.
Okay, so there will be this ONE exception…
(And they are Super Horrible, Evil Beyotches because even after they’ve destroyed my will, I still have to wait months for the bloody hardcover. With friends like these, who needs hemorrhoids?)
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9/30
11/4
11/4
11/25
February 5th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
We need costumes. I, of course, get the skintight black leather. I envision SHEB #2, who is infinitely more evil than I, in pink tulle.
We’re doing you a favor. Do you know how distraught you would be if somebody spoiled Ash for you? And BTW, She Who Must Not Be Named Lest We Puke did mention she thought it would be funny to do that to you, so don’t kid yourself that you could hide from it for a year.
Resolve is great (especially when your anorexic mutt refluxes all over the carpet), except when it’s destined to bring you anguish. Rules, even your own, are made to be broken, dahlink.
February 5th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Couldn’t you have just bought the book for me? Do you have to tease and torment me?
Wow, that was a stupid question. :roll:
February 5th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
Here’s some more torment for ya: What’s happening with The Great Agent Search? You’ve been awful quiet about it.
February 5th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
I’d make some noise if I had any good news. Form rejections aren’t exactly fascinating. I’ll never know if half of them ever got the query because they have a “we’ll respond only if we’re interested” policy. I don’t want to make a big deal out of requests because anything short of an offer doesn’t mean anything.
This part of the process is boring. While I’m perfectly capable of being a drag on occasion, I seldom do it on purpose, so I’m sticking with the policy of silence on this one.
If I’m still mum by, say, September, you can assume I’m accepting my suckishness with quiet dignity.
February 5th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
Epub.
February 5th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
“Dear Epublisher: My book has been rejected by everyone in the traditional publishing industry, but since you publish crap all the time, I’m sure you’ll like it.”
?????
No. Epubs shouldn’t be a “backup plan” if you’re not good enough for print. “Not good enough” isn’t fit for human consumption in any medium. If it comes to that, I’ll just withdraw until I can offer Endeavor B. Which could be a while, because I intend to finish Endeavor A, which is intimately connected to Endeavor C, which melts into Endeavor D…
Remember when I told you not to start with a series? This is why. If you can’t sell the first one, the whole thing is dead. And if you’re obsessive (like moi), you’re compelled to finish it anyway, which could consume a decade of your life for zero yield.
Do as I say, not as I do. :razz: