Mar 31 2008
My goofy visage
Trish (clicking through a million digital photos in search of one appropriate to submit to the GH committee): There is not a single picture of you, dating back to infancy, in which you are not doing something goofy.
Me: I’m goofy looking. It’s okay to be goofy looking when you’re being goofy. Otherwise, it’s just sad.
Trish: Perfect Jr. has one on his desk. Your face is relaxed and pretty and normal in that one.
Me: Great. Scan it. Send it. Problem solved.
Trish: There’s a small problem. Your face is good, but you’re wearing an Organization XIII cloak and a purple-and-black wig.
Me: (snicker) Cosplay. Halloween anytime.
Trish: Pretend to be normal for a minute. (grabs digital camera and snaps several pictures; repeatedly looks from in-the-flesh subject to camera’s display screen) What the hell? You don’t look like this!
Me: Told you I was goofy looking.
Trish: I’m looking right at you, and you are not this pale, this shiny, or this shapeless.
Me: Ah, you have discovered my supervillainess power: image distortion. Even if I’m caught in the villainous act by security cameras, the evidence won’t hold up in court because clearly that’s not me. (points to computer screen) What about that one?
Trish: That’s from 2000, and it’s goofy.
Me: It’s by far the least goofy of the bunch, and who cares how old it is? Not like I’m going to be at the conference to show off my advanced age. You were looking back to baby pictures, for crying out loud.
Trish: It was better than your brilliant idea of sending a picture of Kate Beckinsale.
Me: But not as brilliant as the distant, grainy, out-of-focus Bigfoot sighting-esque picture idea…
9/30
11/4
11/4
11/25
March 31st, 2008 at 8:28 am
Do you WANT to be accused of reflecting poorly on romance?
March 31st, 2008 at 9:31 am
Anyone who belives I am influential enough to sully the image of Romance with a goofy picture needs a reality check.
I made the effort to find a picture that wouldn’t make the majority of people cringe. If someone at the upper end of the Uptight Scale chooses to be embarrassed because I didn’t put on grandma’s pearls and head to Sears Portrait Studio for a headshot, they don’t know how lucky they are I’ve refrained from really expressing myself.
March 31st, 2008 at 9:54 am
What about presenting yourself as a professional writer serious about getting published? Agents and editors will be looking at that picture
March 31st, 2008 at 10:04 am
If you’re having a face-to-face meeting with an agent or editor, by all means, spruce yourself up. If you’re attending a formal awards ceremony, dress to the nines. Doing either of those things in sweats would be inappropriate and would therefore reflect negatively on your judgement and, by extension, your professionalism.
This, however, is a picture that’s going to flash on a screen for 10 seconds at the aforementioned awards ceremony. Frankly, anyone who makes a business decision based on a photograph under those conditions isn’t someone I would trust with my career. “Hm, I liked her book and wanted to work with her, but I don’t like the way she looks, so forget it.” Yeah, that inspires confidence.
Professionalism, as far as I’m concerned, is about the writing and meeting deadlines and being courteous toward the people you work with, not blowing $200 on portraits in which I look like someone’s off to the side with a gun pointed at my head, which is what all my posed photos look like.
March 31st, 2008 at 2:45 pm
Yeah, there’s a reason my photo was taken in the backyard by the husband. And OMG I love your emoticons! I may have to go crazy now!
April 1st, 2008 at 3:58 am
There were bunnies I didn’t take because I didn’t foresee any circumstance in which they would apply, but now I’m thinking I need to go back and get them all.
And seriously, with bunnymunky emoticons, does anybody expect me to look particularly upright and proper?
April 4th, 2008 at 3:06 am
Okay, the offensive material has been officially sent, as laborious search of every picture ever taken of me and enough freshly snapped ones to kill 6 AA Duracell Ultras did not yield more appropriate material. I feel a little bad because the ladies on the GH loop are all going with these appropriate, WWND kind of pics, and there I’ll be, sticking out like a goofy thumb, but—
That’s a lie. I don’t feel bad at all. In fact, I feel kind of