Kerry Allen

This picture has not been altered in any way by Angelic Daughter.

The glowing red eyes may be a symptom of allergies rather than evidence of the the inner evil, however.

I signed up for the el cheapo program with Neflix (one DVD at a time, only limit on the number per month is how fast I can watch them and get them back in the mail). A little while later, they sent me a notification that they were reducing the price. REDUCING. When was the last time anyone REDUCED the price of anything? Sometimes companies do that to lure in new customers, but existing customers are stuck with whatever deal they signed up for (*cough* cable *cough* phone company). Not Netflix. I didn’t even have to ask. I fell in lurve with Netflix that very day.

But that’s not the end of this lurve affair. Not by a long shot.

Once I received a disk that had been gouged in the auto mail sorter. I filled out the online form letting them know the disk was damaged. They emailed me within MINUTES to say they were sending a replacement, and I had it the next day.

Today, I get an email from Netflix apologizing profusely for a delay in sending my next DVD because their shipping system is down. They’re giving me a CREDIT to compensate me for my inconvenience. Keep in mind, I’ve been known to leave a disk sitting around unwatched for 2 weeks because I can’t be bothered to watch it, but if they can’t send one to me INSTANTLY, they offer me an apology and money.

I want to marry Netflix.

In a world where consumers have become resigned to getting shafted every time they deal with a business, it’s a treat to find one that doesn’t screw you over. But one that goes out of their way to treat you right…
True lurve.

I’m at Romancing the Blog again today, dispensing do-it-yourself tips for the unattached heroine who suddenly finds herself without a matchmaker (say, in the wake of lawsuits pertaining to a short-lived disaster of a television series).

And in random unrelated news, I lambasted the vet about the total inefficacy of every flea product in existence because I have used every oral, topical, accessory, prescription, and over-the-counter product in existence and still have an obsessively itchy dog. He says she doesn’t have fleas.

The dog is allergic to GRASS.

So she claws herself to bits, gets litterbox trained, or takes allergy medication for the rest of her life.

Needless to say, we’re going with the drugs.

(We’re all slightly allergic to her, so I thought, What delicious irony if she were allergic to people, but alas, no.)

I watched this Dane Cook special on Comedy Central and didn’t think it was this funny. Just goes to show you, everything is better with Bleach.

This is particulary timely because lately we’ve been amusing ourselves supplying perv dialogue (”Oh, hai! I made semen toast.” “Excuse me?!?!” “Cinnamon toast. I made cinnamon toast. Eat up!”) for Gin (creepy squinty-eyed dude), since the Bount arc in the anime is, ah, less than riveting and Renji is MIA for way too many episodes.

In case y’all haven’t heard about this yet, Harlequin is adding a historical line to its e-shorts offerings (such as Spice Briefs, Nocturne Bites).

Writing Guidelines—Historical UNDONE (working name)

Word Length: 10-15,000 words

Format: eBooks

Senior Editor: Linda Fildew

Editor: Suzanne Clarke

Editorial Assistant: Mimi Berchie

Editorial Office: London

If you’ve always wanted to write for Harlequin Historical, but were daunted by the length, now is your chance to submit something shorter!

The response to Harlequin Historical’s more sensual storylines have been so positive that we are creating a new eBook sexy short story program—Historical UNDONE.

In Historical UNDONE we are looking for a high level of sensuality that flows naturally out of the plotline. There should be a strong emotional basis to the heightened attraction—it’s vital the reader can believe in the intense emotion driving the characters as their relationship develops. These stories should be hot, sexy and subtly explicit without the lovemaking being vulgar or gratuitous.

Whether you choose a dark and devilishly sexy Regency rake caught in a compromising situation with a headstrong miss, or a courageous Saxon lady held captive by a powerful Norman warrior, your characters should be fully fleshed out and should be the main focus of the story.

The history should be well researched in order to give an authentic sense of period without taking over from the romance. We are happy to consider stories set in ancient civilizations up to and including the First and Second World Wars. What remains ever popular are the Regency tales, which could see your characters scandalizing high society or being drawn into a salacious underworld inhabited by pickpockets and courtesans!

We are also open to slightly different elements from those normally found in Harlequin Historical books. Please feel that you can explore aspects of the paranormal and time travel.

You do not need to be agented to send material to us. We are actively looking for talented new authors and wish you every success with your submissions.

Only complete manuscripts submitted electronically will be considered—no partials or queries, please. Submissions should be sent as a Word-compatible attachment. Submissions should also follow standard formatting guidelines and should be double-spaced and typed in a clear, legible font on numbered pages. Author name and title should appear as a header or footer on each page.

Historical UNDONE e-mail address: undone@harlequin.ca

(Lifted straight from the eHarlequin forum.)