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The Heroine Academy
(Formerly hosted at RomanceCooties.com) A group of unlikely heroines-in-training encounters secrets, schemes, and an unspeakable evil on the path to the inevitable HEA.

COMING SOMEDAY!

Pirpires of the Cacaobean: Curse of the Peanut Butter Cup
Eighties-style bodice-ripping adventure with fanged swashbuckler Malcolm Maximilian Marrs and confectionery heiress Reese Hershey.

Part 1: Ships Passing in the Midday

Part 2: All’s Well That Ends My Way

Part 3: Booty Is In the Eye of the Beholder

Part 4: A Man After My Own Jugular

Part 5: A Bloodsucker Born Every Minute

Poetry Schmoetry
Heartwarming stories told in elegant verse by “the Dr. Seuss of romance.”

Ode to Turgid Pleasure Rod

Ode to Zaftig Ladies

Rap for Pulsing Dog

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C.J. Redwine: No gangrene! How can I catch, er, kidnap, no wait ... TALK to Johnny Depp with gangrene?

Kerry: Only as a short-term solution. Cut off circulation for too long and you'll get gangrene and lose a limb. *has seen* *is not pretty* *or pleasant smelling* *you do not want* *trust me*

C.J. Redwine: *is no longer bleeding* *tourniquets are awesome*

Kerry: Yes, best not to bleed anywhere these days, lest you attract diseased-looking sparklepires.

C.J. Redwine: *accepts cleaver and thanks you for the manly shoulders warning* Think this mood is direct result of stressful week from hell (Gee... you think?) and it's best to pour it into my revisions rather than bleed it all over the internets.

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